Why would “The Nature of Desire” be the theme of a serious environmental lecture series like Illahee? What is the connection between desire and the environment? As Illahee director Peter Schoonmaker explains, “Because desire drives consumption, and consumption is destroying the earth“.
I agree with Peter. In fact, I see the diamond-cut life as being about chiseling our human desires into win-wins for people, the planet and all species. To desire is natural; what we choose to do with our desire affects not just us, but everyone around us, and even those not around us.
I heard writer Susan Cheever give the March Illahee lecture this past Wednesday night. She’s the author of “My Name is Bill W.”, the biography of the man who started Alcoholics Anonymous. Ms. Cheever related that all addictions, whether to sex, alcohol, food or shopping, are driven by the desire to feel better. She reports the causes of addiction as a tryptych of genetics, trauma and environment. For example, research on rats in cramped, uncomfortable cages versus rats in ideal, spacious, stimulating environment revealed that the miserable rats were 19 times were more likely to get addicted to morphine than the rats living in the happy setting.
Ms. Cheever’s insight fell down, in my view, when she tried to define addiction. “If you find yourself breaking promises around something, you’re addicted to it,” she said. “If not, you’re not. Did you promise to only drink one bottle of whiskey instead of two? No? Then you didn’t break a promise, and you’re not addicted.”
As a former alcohol/drug counselor, my heart sank on hearing a respected speaker present this viewpoint as if it were a fact. Actually, my blood pressure rose, as well. I have seen lives damaged and destroyed by addiction, not just those of the alcoholic/addict, but dozens of lives in concentric circles around them. I’ve observed that broken promises are typical but by no means a defining factor in any given addiction.
In fact, when an addiction is at its height, the addict sees no need to make any promises to abstain, because she or he is simply feeling good, and feeling no painful consequences. The people around him or her are absorbing all the consequences. If addicts set their bars low enough, promises won’t come into play at all — but they are addicted, nonetheless. I believe Ms. Cheever is misinforming people when she makes the defining characteristic of addiction to be broken promises.
We in the U.S. are 4 % of the world’s population, but we’re consuming 25% of the world’s fossil fuels and other resources, despite knowing the facts about global warming, etc. Have we promised as a nation to reduce our consumption? No. Are we addicted to our consumption? I’d say we are. From what I read and hear, many seem to agree with me.
Ms. Cheever closed her lecture by saying that we in the U.S. need to look carefully at our stories, at what we are telling ourselves. “We need to find new ways of looking at ourselves, both as individuals and as a nation.” On that point, I agree. We need to see that consuming less can actually make us happier than we currently are, and research supports this. See The Peak of Happiness.
As a mental health professional, and a recovering person, I was not impressed with Cheever’s presentation. It seemed very much like an off night. Even before she was being introduced I felt the night was not going to go anywhere good as the moderator rambled on about trying to get a stripper to come to the presentation. I just didn’t see the connection between strippers and desire. Who knows, maybe I’m just old, uptight, dimwitted and grumpy… but maybe not, I just expected something more insightful.
I was disappointed with Cheever’s discussion of addiction. I think she comes to the topic as a writer, not a scientist or policy maker. I think we, the audience at Illahee, came to her with questions more suited to someone with expertise in science, psychology, and/or public health.
As a recovering alcoholic, I know that when I was in the midst of my addiction I did not see any reason to make or break promises to myself. Why make a promise to oneself when one doesn’t have a problem? There is a saying that a non-alcoholic will change his lifestyle to meet his goals whereas an alcoholic will change his goals to meet his lifestyle. With no goals other than staying loaded, it is easy to avoid making or breaking any promises.
For me, hitting bottom was discovering that I wanted to stop drinking and that I could not. This “moment of clarity” was not the moment I became addicted; I had been addicted long before. Cheever seems to conflate the moment of clarity with the addiction by saying that one cannot be addicted until one has the moment of clarity’s subsequent broken promises.
This disregards the basic facts of addictive consumption. By her definition, someone can drink (as I did) everyday to excess (blacking out, vomiting, etc.) and not be able to stop drinking, but not be an alcoholic because, woops, no broken promises.
So, I think you’re right when you say the promises really are not the problem.